Healing

It has been a blessing that Kielan has had a place to go to. That his mom had a place to turn when things were so dangerous for him.
And he is a good guy. He is trying to make a go of it. He has worked hard. But, it's more than hard work. It's the peeling away of layers of habits and desires. It is a lot of effort. And it's scary. Really scary.
It reminds me of burn patients. The only way to heal them is to scrape and peel off the dead, burned tissue.........revealing the tender tissue underneath. I've heard that the pain is excrutiating.
But it's the only way to get well. That old, dead tissue will allow the good tissue to get infected underneath. It will kill the body. So, the process, though painful, is necessary.
So it is with Kielan. So it is with all of us. He has to learn not to blow off what is important and how to walk away from things that are dangerous. Don't we all? Isn't he just like all of us are to varying degrees?
Healing is hard. It is demanding. It requires commitment. When we are children, our parents can decide what we will be committed to. Like Kielan's mama did for him. She put him in an environment where they can help get back to good and real living. But, he still has a choice. He can spend his time faking. He can spend it hiding in a corner. He can spend the time feeling sorry for himself. He can spend the time blaming everyone else. He can spend it plotting what he will do when he gets out. He can spend time figuring out how to escape. Or. Yes, there's an or. Or, he can spend the time allowing himself to heal. He can spend the time accepting love. He can spend the time getting real. He can take responsibility. It will require his choosing.
As adults we don't have people to MAKE us go somewhere. But, we do have friends and people who might say we need help. We need to listen. And then we need to make choices. Who to hang out with. What to do when we are depressed. How to think about things. How to take responsibility for our actions.
Kielan is a amazing because he's always seen what people need. He failed to see what he needed, but aren't we all a little blind when it comes to seeing ourselves? He is having to be incredibly courageous. It hurts to heal. It is painful to peel off the protective coatings from being burned. It is hard to be that vulnerable.
My hope is that we will show as much courage in life. I saw a kid yesterday. His thumbs through the slits in the wrists of his black, oversized hoodie. His backpack slung low. His jeans skinny. Shoes that looked too big. Walking alone. Looking even more alone. His eyes were sad. His face bore no joy of the weekend. And I wondered if we really see people.
Have we gotten so involved in our own selves that we just don't care anymore?
If you do care. Do something. Help people heal. Let them help you heal. Because that's the other thing about a burn unit...........the patients don't take off the dead skin by themselves. Loving people with the right tools come faithfully and regularly and lovingly to get the job done.
Let's be healers. First we have to see the people who are burned. Then we have to suck it up and help. It isn't pretty. They will scream. In pain. And at us. (ever been to watch a hard birth?) They will say ugly things. They will try to push us away. And we will bind their wounds.
And cry. And hope. And painstakingly do what we came to do.
And eventually, healing will come. But all healing takes time. It is the nature of our bodies. And our minds. And our emotions. We can't just want it, we have to live through the healing process. And that's hard. We like instant gratification. "I was willing, so that should be good enough". Follow through is without a doubt the hardest thing to do in life.
Listen when people try to help. Allow the layers to be stripped away. But don't think that because you are willing that it will be painless. But, it will be worth it. And, don't forget to do the same for others.
blessings,
rhonda