Monday, September 14, 2009

To Clean or Not to Clean

I am in a conundrum. I am working on cleaning the room of my four boys. The eldest just left for college, leaving quite the pile of castoffs behind. The other three enjoyed rummaging through for what they wanted and now there sits the dregs. In the closet there are two dozen pairs of shoes, clothes strewn, instruments, blankets(one son likes to go in there to read and sleep), pillows (see aforementioned son's habit), trash, books....piles of them, and cast off toys. Seriously, that is just the closet. You can't even imagine the wonders of each drawer and shelf. I have begun piling and sorting. Trying to figure out what is what. I have a bathtub full of tennies soaking. My eleventh grade son learned how to get them really clean and new, so I'm trying it. I have cringed at the mega pile of clothes that I have tossed into the middle of the floor. This is after they have "cleaned" their room and gotten rid of what they don't want or don't need. One son had over a hundred dollars sitting on a shelf. No, I didn't take it to compensate myself for all of my trouble. The same son has four wallets. This son can never find a wallet to take to the store. Sigh.
I found three twenty Q games. Innumberable nerf dart guns. Several disc guns. Books everywhere.......well, except for on the one empty shelf. I'm not quite sure what to do with it all either. The thing is this: I know why some of the stupid little things make them smile. They are a little memory. They don't really use it or anything, but they remember who gave it to them or where they got it. And I understand that. Memories are important to me. Losing my mom at such a young age makes me appreciate the silly little things that people have stored away.....that's what I got from my grandma when I got old enough......my mom's "treasures".
However, somehow we have to navigate this room. And no matter how many drawers or shelves there are, the boys seem most content with their stuff out and all around them. Driving their parents nuts.
My third son has what we call the "nest". He loves having his belongings right with him. On his bed. Clothes. Stuffed animals. Books. Snacks....yes, ick. Important papers. Laptop. You name it, he keeps it close at hand. Perhaps that's why he was sleeping in the closet?
But it is time to rearrange the room. And we are having a garage sale on the weekend. So, I have braved a few drawers and shelves. I am sorting. But then I think, is this really MY job? I mean, I do it and within a matter of hours, they have it back to their comfy cozy status. So, I don't think I am doing it for their sakes. Maybe it makes me feel like a better mom. Not really. Makes me feel like a more tired mom.:)
But then, maybe there's another reason. It's like a little memory trip. I, too, see things that make me smile. That bring back a good memory. You can imagine how many baby teeth I find. And somehow, though it's an icky, time consuming, hard job, it's also a pleasure. I'm so glad to have them. To have them be a part of my life.
Maybe this time is so hard because Joe is gone. And, it's hard for any of us to part with any of his stuff.....even the dregs. I mean, we still look for his car in the driveway. I am still surprised in the mornings to find his littlest brother in his bed in the mornings. Maybe I have to do this so that I can finally feel like he has moved out.
I don't know, but I better get back to it because I only have about four more hours before I have to pick them up at school, and frankly, it won't be close to enough time.
Oh, yes, all four boys have been in one room. It's a four hundred square foot room with a walk in closet and full bath. So, there's lot of room to hide, I mean, store stuff.
blessings,
rhonda

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