Snap Out of It

Depression is a very real and a very serious condition. I am not going to be talking about clinical depression which requires meds and perhaps changes in lifestyle and diet. The depression I am talking about is circumstancial. Otherwise known as the gloomies. That's a heads up because I know about the other kind, and I would write nothing funny about it. It is serious and it is painful to everyone around.
That said, I have been thinking about depression, the gloomies. You know the feelings that come and threaten to overwhelm you. Sometimes it's just that life has brought some very unpleasant circumstances: broken relationships, death, illness, sick kids, bad meal at a restaurant, lack of money, or whatever is what brings you down. Sometimes it's PMS.......and what about when it seems to last for say, six months? "Yes, I'm grumpy, don't bother me about it!" You know, the people you want to tell to invest in the Midol company. And sometimes it's just inner loneliness. A feeling of walking all alone. But whatever causes it, it changes a time of life. It changes your view. It changes my normally rather happy demeanor into a meaner demeanor.
Strangely, nobody ever seems to want to admit that life stinks. "Oh, I'll be fine." "I'll work through it." It's as if somehow there is shame in painful emotions. "I'll snap back soon." Snapping back is as impossible as reelastizing the limp elastic in old undies. It just isn't going to happen. Toss those babies in the trash and head off to the store to get new undies. Or maybe, get new undies then toss those in the trash? Whichever, the point is, get rid of the undies that fall down and bunch up. Don't keep trying to make them work for you. And when you have the gloomies, well, covering them up doesn't really work. It's like spraying room deodorizer after changing a bad diaper, sure, it's kind of better, but not really. It's kind of icky really.
But what to do? I mean, nobody really wants to be around people who have the chronic gloomies. And, unless, as mentioned above, it's a more serious problem, the gloomies don't usually last forever. They are a season and even within the season they wane.
What I propose is embracing the reality of the situation. I AM GLOOMY!! Admit it loud and clear to yourself. Quit trying to cover it up. Quit trying to be super woman.......her outfit really wouldn't be that flattering on most of us anyway. Now, Wonder Woman......nah, don't try to be her either, you'd have to get used to those really big bracelets and wear poofy hair. So, quit trying. The outfit doesn't fit. I mean, who fights battles in heels and a swimsuit with lots of bling? Give it up. Let it go. You are not her. You are you. And right now, or in the future, you have the gloomies. Sigh. Snivel. Get some pathetic balloons. Tie them to your chair. Have a pity party. Allow yourself to mourn or feel sorry for yourself for some time. Plan to cry. No, sweetie, I don't mean a little cry where your mascara might run, I mean a big, slobbery, messy, the mascara rolled off and down your face thirty minutes ago and you have soaked a pillow cry. And when you are done, now don't be surprised by this, you will probably cry again. The first crying is finally releasing all of the gloomy feelings, the second seems to be where we mourn whatever it is that put us in the gloomy place. And then. No, silly, it's not over.......you forgot the food. Eat comfort food, junk food, whatever it is that makes you smile. Eating is a good thing. It replenishes all of the energy that you use up with the gloomies. Women know this innately. They are the queens of eating when stressed.
What should the venue be? Some people pity party alone. Depending on what's wrong, it's an ok option. Some people don't know they need a pity party and they need a friend to show up with a quart of Ben and Jerry's and some chips and dip and a huge box of tissue. Don't forget the balloons. The pathetic balloons are very important because the next day when you are feeling somewhat better, you will see those balloons, and I kid you not, they will make you smile. You will remember letting go of all of that emotion. Quit holding onto it. Quit pretending to have everything together. If you own what is really happening, you can be genuinely happy instead of fake happy. Fake happy makes other people uncomfortable. They know you are being witchy, but they can't say anything because you are pretending to be fine.
Put aside the pretense. Be you. You were made with emotions. You experience pain. You have to do something with it. And it's impossible to snap out of it. Don't forget those undies.
Party on.
blessings,
rhonda